Morning With Me

In which I Do The Thing

Recently, blogosphere, I have been kissing a guy (and I’ve been liking it.)

I know, right.

Gulp.

We’ll call him Sexy New Guy for now, as I don’t wish to reveal his identity just yet and he’s somebody I’ve known for a while and he’s funny and clever and has a smile that reminds me of Indiana Jones and he’s just all around excellent and it’s just generally a very nice time.

It’s weird really, because if you’d have told me this time last year that by Christmas I’d be puckering up for a guy that wasn’t The Ex Boyfriend then probably I would have laughed in your face, and yet, here we are.

Maybe people will think it’s too soon, and maybe people will think it’s not soon enough, personally I think it’s been almost a freaking year good gracious and that really there are much worse things I could be doing than kissing a guy who makes my tummy do the flippy thing.

And Sexy New Guy is lovely, and you want to know another thing: it was surprisingly easy. Falling into being with somebody again, into being with him was so so easy.  I think that’s always the thing isn’t it, putting yourself back out there is hard and scary and there’s this niggling voice in the back of your mind that’s whispering ‘you’re not pretty/funny/interesting enough’ and it would be so easy to just sort of stay indoors with a good book and Netflix forever. Especially when there are so many episodes of Pretty Little Liars to watch.

But then I remembered a conversation I’d had with Jen months ago, which was in no way related to this at all, but where she said (wisely because she is so wise) ‘girls get nowhere if they don’t ask for shit.’

Even at the time I wanted to applaud her (and did, I think) and it’s stayed with me, and even though this, this new relationship, this kisses and tickles and laughter and this shiny new taste of happiness, isn’t really me asking for anything, it’s kind of the same, you know? It’s me stepping back and thinking ‘I am fucking amazing and I’ll be damned if I’m going to wither away under a patchwork quilt. & I am pretty/funny/interesting enough, if not to anybody else then at least to me. AND SO, I am going to Do The Thing.’

And I did. I Did The Thing. I went on a date and he kissed me and I went on another date and he kissed me again and two dates became three and then there was a holiday and soon there will be another holiday and dating and here we are.

For someone who’s been out of that particular game for A Long Time, it wasn’t as daunting as I had expected it to be to start to share my life with a person who isn’t the person I’ve shared a life with for years. It was kind of refreshing. It was refreshing and it was fun and I find myself falling asleep most nights these days with a smile on my face and you know what? Right now, I feel happy. I am so fucking happy.

My advice then, to you, to everyone everywhere is to always always Do The Thing.

Whatever your thing is – do it.

Cure cancer; write that book; buy your dream house; leave that job you hate and find one you love; go for a drink with that person you think is kind of cute; when that guy you like leans in for a kiss you make sure you pucker those lips, dammit.  Because like Jen said once, girls get nowhere if they don’t ask for shit and like I say, girls get nowhere if they don’t Do The Thing.

Let's Talk Ratings

I’m always kind of curious about ratings and how people rate the books they’ve read, and how they might interpret the ratings system and how it all works and what it all means. 

& sometimes because of this I feel bad because – for example - I think 3 stars is good, but what if other people think 3 stars is only okay, what if they think I liked a book less than I did because I’ve ‘only’ given it 3 stars and why do I care so much. 

Also, 5 stars.

I see so many 5 star reviews and that’s amazing, naturally, because who doesn’t want to read all the 5 star books, but I dunno, I kind of save my 5 stars, I only give them to books that blow me away and when I see people giving 5 stars to everything, it makes me wonder if they see 5 stars as something different to me and if they give 5 stars to everything then what do they have left when that book comes along? (How many times did I say 5 stars in that paragraph good gracious.)

And so, because I keep thinking about this, I figured if for no other reason than to shut myself up, today I shall talk about how I rate my reviews– broken down into the star rating and how I interpret it, with a little Blaine Anderson gif for illustrative purposes because I love both Glee and Blaine Anderson completely unironically (but that’s another story for another day.) Basically, I just want Darren Criss’s face on my blog. 

So. HERE WE GO.

 If I give a book 5 of the stars it’s because I’m saying to you that THIS BOOK IS SO AMAZING I HAVE LOST THE ABILITY TO EVEN. This is booklove like no other guys, this is me, drowning in feels and unable to do anything other than flail around in a mess of fangirl. It’s reserved for the best of the best.

4 stars means this book is an excellent book. This is a book that made me happy, maybe even left me with a book hangover. A book that whilst may be not quite head over heels in love with, I could certainly see myself fall for. It’s a book that’s different, and well written, that grabbed me and didn’t let go and left me feeling like it’s better than most other books. 

3 stars: This book is a good book. I liked it. This is always the iffy one for me, because I think 3 stars is a pretty darn good rating but I feel like other people might feel like it’s only ‘okay.’ & that makes me wary. Sometimes I feel like I need to justify a three star rating. Here’s the thing: if I give a book 3 stars then it’s because it’s A Good Book. Do I enjoy my 3 star books?

2 stars: I am indifferent towards this book. It was okay. I didn’t like it, particularly, but I didn’t really dislike it either. These books probably leave me feeling a bit ‘meh,’ a bit 'what did I just read?' These are the books that I've finished but I won't re-read and won't recommend and certainly won't be gushing over. The books that make me feel a bit '....what?'

 1 star: Do not like. Nope. In fact, we could even go so far as to say I actively dislike the 1 star books. I don’t rock out the 1 star very often, which pleases me. 

And that is that. So tell me: do you rate in the same way I rate, and if you don’t then what do you do differently? And is Blaine Anderson not the most adorable Blaine to ever Blaine?